Daddy39s 10 rules of dating

09-Jul-2018 05:51

Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?Rule Eight~: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. I may appear to be a potbellied,balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been.It's important to remember that even if your date is not your dream guy, you are gathering information and experience, called Dating Data, that you will use on future dates with someone more to your liking.Thou Shalt Not Drink Too Much on the First Date Although it may be very tempting, in order to relax, drinking more than two alcoholic beverages could cloud your judgment.

daddy39s 10 rules of dating-74

Rule Three~: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips.

Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to introduce my daughter to wear shorts,tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka -- zipped up to her throat. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi.

Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home.

Rule Two~: You do not touch my daughter in front of me.

You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck.

Rule Three~: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips.Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to introduce my daughter to wear shorts,tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka -- zipped up to her throat. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi.Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home.Rule Two~: You do not touch my daughter in front of me.You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck.This includes not chasing him by calling or emailing him excessively.